Reflections of Christmas

Can you believe its the New Year? I am having a difficult time jumping back in and running full speed ahead again. Christmas was its usually mad, crazy, rush of fun. The kids and I headed up to mom and dad's on Christmas Eve after picking my grandmother up from the Assisted Living home she is now at. I had spent the week prior cooking, wrapping and second guessing weather I had bought enough since I had finished my shopping very early this year.

Christmas Eve was wonderful in its usual tradition. With thick German blood in my family we have always celebrated both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day as a family. In years past we had tried a variety of ways on how we got together but since I have been single again the usual 'game' plan leaves me packing like crazy and spending the night on mom and dad's sofa. We did the same this year. The biggest difference was on Christmas day.

Dennis's arrangement with his kids are a bit different and this year he wasn't going to have his kids on Christmas day. Being the soppy sentimentalist I couldn't have that for him, so he flew out and I ran down to the airport on Christmas Day to pick him up. Ill admit I had NO idea so many people flew out of town on this holiday and it was far more crowded then I would have expected. We grabbed a cup of coffee together and then headed back up to mom and dad's. I need to add the temperature when I picked him up.....a nice balmy 84 degrees!!!!!!! Grrr

We spent the rest of the day at mom and dad's and then headed back home after packing everything back up. The day then was unpacking, cooking a quick meal and falling asleep as soon as possible. The next day the kids left. The week long breaks the kids have with their father both in summer and winter 'suck'. Im sorry for the language, but honestly there is just no other way to describe it. Tears running down my face we watched the kids pull away and leave. Dennis gave me a nice hug and reassured me the week would go quickly. He was right, in many ways it did. We headed back out to Arizona shortly after and I spent the remaining time the kids were gone with him and his family in Arizona. I met his dad and his wife for the first time after their drive out from Colorado and spent the next few days while Dennis had to work getting to know them better. It was a great treat. The day they left, his kids came home. Funny thing was it made me miss mine all the more. I don't really know why, but its almost harder when his kids are there and mine aren't. Maybe its the stark reality that mine are not there that makes it all the more obvious. Yesterday I returned home, in the midst of all the other holiday traffic. The kids beat me by a few minutes and then we got to cuddle the remainder of the night.

I'm beat, exhausted and wore out....are there any other words that might descibe this? Not sure :) but today the Christmas decorations came down and slowly we return to 'normalicy' .... whatever that may mean. The greatest treat of the week though......waking up snow sitting on the convertible! The car leaked, that wasn't so great, but the snow was fabulous! Dennis didn't find it as amusing as I did, being that he is more use to it and does'nt enjoy it. What's the deal with always wanting what we can't have? If we have snow we hate it, if we don't we dream of it? But I did get to build my snowman and throw snowballs.....what more could I have hoped for!