Struggling with focus

Leaving the theater this afternoon after going to see Bourne Ultimatum with my son it kind of hit me. "This is my life". It isn't at all what I wanted, but I am blessed all the same to have the things I have. Life seems to be passing me by while I sit reflecting on the things I want instead of all that I have. I honestly don't know how to get past the wants and desires in my life. I don't know how to get past the other side of the garden always seems greener. I picture a life I want for myself, for my children but that isn't apparently what the Lord has in store for me, at least for now. How do we get past the struggle?

I framed on my computer cabinet door the saying " Happiness is getting what we want, Contentment is being happy with what we have" I suppose I need to change my focus, my focus needs to be put back on contentment, not happiness. "Happiness" can come and go so quickly. The birth of a child can make two parents the happiest they have ever felt, and then in a fleeting second the death or divorce in that family can rip that family apart.....happiness gone in a flash replaced with emptiness. I suppose I feel empty. I don't like this feeling. The struggles of life have gotten the better of me, the passion disappeared. I want it back. I think it comes with the feeling of contentment. Being 'happy' in all things. The thing is, I just don't know where I belong. Im a single mom, struggling in relationships, job, parenting, home remodeling, and to top it off this is the month I get to celebrate the passing of yet another year of my life. Arrrgh.

I need to change my focus, from happiness, to contentment. I just wish it was as easy as all that.